Chandigarh, September 26: Grief, in its first days, is expected. A lost parent, a broken bond, a life turned upside down — sorrow takes hold and refuses to let go. But when that melancholy stretches not into weeks or months, but into years, it becomes something far heavier than ordinary sadness. Doctors now warn that unresolved grief can leave scars as real as any physical wound.
Psychiatrists describe the condition as complicated grief or persistent depressive disorder, where sorrow lingers for years and often deepens instead of fading. “We see patients who still feel the loss as raw as the first day, even after a decade,” says one clinical psychologist. “It becomes part of their identity, shaping how they think, act, and connect with others.”
The effects ripple through the body. Long-term grief alters sleep patterns, strains the heart, and raises risks of high blood pressure and weakened immunity. Scientists point to stress hormones that remain elevated, keeping the body in a constant state of alarm. Friends and families may notice weight loss, irritability, or exhaustion — but beneath these symptoms lies a quiet erosion of resilience.
For many, the greatest toll is social. Years of melancholy create distance in relationships; birthdays and gatherings turn into reminders of absence. Work suffers, not only because of fatigue, but because concentration falters. “It’s like living in two worlds at once,” says a woman in her 40s who lost her husband young. “One is the world outside, and the other is the world where time stopped.”
Researchers argue that time alone is not enough to heal grief that becomes chronic. Counseling, therapy, and support groups have shown success in helping people rebuild meaning. Rituals of remembrance — whether through writing, prayer, or community gatherings — can also ease the ache that refuses to loosen.
The danger of unaddressed grief is not only personal but generational. Children growing up around unresolved sorrow often absorb the silence and pain, carrying it into their own adult lives. Experts caution that grief unattended becomes a cycle, echoing across families.
What makes grief so powerful, and so lasting, is that it stems from love and attachment. But when the shadow of loss remains for years, it demands more than endurance. It calls for recognition, compassion, and at times, professional help.
As one psychiatrist put it: “Grief is a natural response to loss. But when it becomes a way of life, it stops being healing and starts being harm.”
